Your nearest and dearest....are they best qualified to help in your search for a new job?

My friend Lisa lives in Australia, she emailed me last week to let me know that she is in a play, and has the lead role…she is playing Mildred, of George and Mildred from the TV series. Whilst she is delighted that she has landed this, she is also a little perturbed that her fellow actors think she is old enough to play the part!

If you are a child of the 60’s, as I am (and Lisa), you will remember the show. Mildred was the dominant partner in the marriage…and despite their ups and downs and comedy roundabouts, as a couple they were together.

In life we hit ups and downs and none more of a down than a partner losing a job. When my husband was made redundant after 30 years as an engineer, it was far more of a blow to me than it ever was to him. At the time I tried to advise and counsel him what to do, (after all I was qualified to do this, wasn’t I), yet he flatly refused to listen to my thoughts, ideas, networking activity leads for him and went his own merry way!

In the last few months I have met 2 clients whose job search activity has not been helped by their partners. You see, they and I, are just too close to be impartial to the thoughts, suggestions and ideas that they willingly offer. I’m sure their partners (and my) intentions were 100% well meant and appropriate, (or so we thought).

So if you are job searching and have a partner who is leading and pointing the way to you, what can you do? My suggestion is to find either a career coach or someone who has worked with you closely in the past, most importantly someone who you trust, and who will give you a balanced perspective and feedback on what to do next and how to deal with job loss.

Schedule some time to meet up with them, talk, let them listen and most importantly ask them for some feedback on where you are at the moment.

Then sit back, reflect and listen carefully to your inner voice, what is it saying? What is it telling you right now? Then tap into what your partner, career coach or friend are saying. If you step out of yourself and look at the situation objectively, what advice would you give yourself?

Good luck with your next steps into the future!